Webster's Dictionary defines marriage as "the state of being united to a person of the opposite sex as husband or wife in a consensual and contractual relationship recognized by law." I hope it is more than this. When I think of marriage I prefer the way the bible puts it: (Genesis 2:18), " Then the Lord God said, 'It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him.'" This is the way I see my fiancé, granted much more than just a helper. She is my God designed partner, created just for me to add value to my life that I never thought possible. It sounds cliché, but she's everything I'm not, she challenges me to be a better person, and she understands me better than anyone in my life. I know marriage is difficult, and I'm not saying we won't have our own struggles, probably more than I care to admit. But when I think of the rest of my life with her I can't help but know it will be better.
Coming from a divorced home, I realize that my view of marriage is probably a little skewed from those with married parents. But in some ways I think I cherish marriage more than the average person. I have seen how difficult life and having a family can be with divorced parents. This has made me long for a woman to call my wife and start a family with that lasts forever. I want someone to go through life with that will always be there to experience all that life has to offer, the victories and the losses. With failed marriages proceeding left and right, I know that this is not easily obtained. But I have faith that God has designed a woman for me and has brought her into my life with surgical precision.
Perhaps I am overly optimistic, but I even see every argument we will have as an opportunity to learn something new about her and grow together from. I know that I may lose sight of this from time to time, but I pray daily that God blesses our fights in this way. Something my "soon-to-be" father and mother-in-law have taught me is the importance of communication. One thing that I love about their marriage, and their family, is that they openly discuss everything. It does get heated from time to time, but it always seems to end a happy accord with no stone left unturned. Everyone has given their opinion, and left the other person free of assumption without having to read the other's mind. Good communication is something that I think makes every relationship better. This is magnified tenfold in marriage. In order to live with a person for a lifetime, communication needs to be something you make a priority.
About
Steve and Rajan Trafton are the owners and operators of the Hideaway Experience, which began ministering to couples in 2006. With over 25 years of a healthy, happy marriage, the Traftons have a deep passion for seeing God redeem and transform marriages. They currently serve on the board of directors for MarriageToday, a nationally known and broadcasted marriage ministry and television program hosted by Jimmy and Karen Evans. Steve and Rajan currently live in Amarillo, Texas and have two children Jet and Chance and a son-in-law, Tanner Hargrove.
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Seth Godin
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Mars Hill Seattle
Trinity Fellowship
The Village Church
Gospel Coalition
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Adventures of SuperMom